September 21, 2024 | Date of original thoughts, written over time…Posted Today!
I had a rather quiet birthday. It was nice. I guess one can say, my birthday came and my birthday went; and for some reason, I didn’t really have much time to focus on my birthday. At the initial start in writing this journal, it was two days after my birthday in September. I truly did not have time…oh my…time to finish this journal. In fact, it has been a start-stop journey, just trying to get this journal started…and of course finish it.
November 10, 2024 | Part 2
It’s now November 10th and I actually have an opportunity to contemplate turning 54…hopefully. I’ve never been one to really make a huge fanfare about my birthday or advancing to the next age. I do recall turning 50 as something really significant. It just felt great. Hovering at the pinnacle of my career (so I believed), excited for what was new to come and reflecting on my journey up to the age of 50 at the time.
I am now brought back into a reflective mode thinking about who I am, my previous experiences and interactions, both positive and challenging. I’m excited for the new direction of my business, Black Paper + Cloth and the reinvention and interpretation of what Black Paper + Cloth initially was and where it is going to be in its next iteration.
Let me start with the direction and new shift of the brand, Black Paper + Cloth, because it connects to my evolution – the next phase along my life’s journey. When I started my business, I wanted to create a retail space to connect people to clothing that is stylish, comfortable and functional, while also building a community centering a space for belonging and evolving style; while having conversations around what is style and the meaningful ways we define our style. Not necessarily in terms of how to wear clothes and what’s on trend, but rather, how the aspect of clothing and how we wear those clothes, becomes emblematic of who we are as individuals within a society where cohesion is almost the definitive norm.
I felt, in a…launching into territory that I only experienced as an outsider, part-time way…to I really desire to do this work as my primary work and not as a secondary hobby of interest. Besides, creating Black Paper + Cloth was not just something I decided to do during COVID (though it was my impetus for taking a leap of faith), it was at least more than three decades of thought and planning which began with the fact that I wanted to do something related to fashion, art, music, interior design, architecture and home decor. Embodying aspects of my lifestyle that was in some ways kept boxed in, with singular emblematic expressions through how I dressed or my favorite shopping experiences, for example. Yet, developing something that would fill my need for freedom, to being creative and be solely my own…on my own terms. Not fulfilling the directives or demands of someone else or another entity. ~To be continued…
November 15, 2024 | Part 3
I have been planning for the relaunch of my brand for quite some time now. Black Paper + Cloth was going to be my “retirement plan”. Something that I was going to do when I officially retire in my 60’s. The aspiration that I was programming my thinking as a later event, as opposed to a now reality. Something of which I am glad, elated actually, that during COVID I decided to move my own goal post and take the chance.
Though I never considered myself an entrepreneur, I did start two small businesses, one was as a private piano instructor and the other was in clothing construction. These were ventures that I began in my teens that evolved into small-ish, part-time businesses that attracted a tight-knit word-of-mouth clientele, offering a highly curated collection of services that brought in a decent amount of additional income. Income that at first solely took care of teen-to-college student expense needs such as gas for car, food, school supplies, personal clothing allowance, makeup, skin care, fabric, patterns and sewing supplies. Evolving into mainly providing the additional funds, apart from my teaching salary, that allowed me the opportunity to create my wardrobe with original designs or those fashioned from patterns. I would purchase such things as art supplies, yarns, fabric, sewing supplies, patterns, shoes and handbags. I also enjoyed unique finds in houseware, select fashion magazines, books, journals, and pattern catalogs.
As I reflect back to those years where I had more energy to work my “day job” as a teacher then senior administrator and spend nearly equal the amount of hours, if not longer; sewing clothes to outfit my personal wardrobe, in a constant state of contentment and peace. I am at a place now where I wish I could devote more time to my creative interests as a swap out for the decades-long stint in education. Not very sure how the 50/50 work-hobby model shifted or when. Now, I am struggling to take out time to regain my sense of creativity because the demands of daily work literally is depleting the energy of youth I once had.
At times I feel quite frustrated by this, but always reassuring myself that I can and should take my time. Take one moment at a time. That inhaling and exhaling, listening for my breath is far better than rushing or pushing through. Which is why I paused what I was doing with my first iteration of Black Paper + Cloth. Of course my work at the moment as an elementary school principal is absorbing a great deal of my time and energy, which also added to the need to pause my business, while yet pushing me through the pause to create a renewed purpose with a different point of view. My needs now for Black Paper + Cloth have changed from my launch in 2021. Not focusing on retail sales, but rather a space where fashion, education and transformative leadership intersects while being grounded by my love for style. ~To be continued…
November 30, 2024
I have changed within those short years, when at age 51 I first went live with Black Paper + Cloth to now re-defining and re-envisioning the purpose and relevancy of this brand. In many ways reinventing myself through this new journey. For now I know what I want and where, at this time, I want to take the brand. In essence, my own personal journey that positions me into a new phase of life and style journey. A journey that allows for reflection, introspection and a redetermination to live unapologetically fabulous!
As I finally conclude this post, I invite you along on this journey and encourage you to inhale, exhale, reflect and create (or recreate) your definition and essence of style. Allowing yourself to identify those intersecting parts that inspires you, excites you and permits you to live unapologetically amazing?
Until the next time…Be inspired. Be empowered. Be Fabulous!
Felicia xoxo
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